bertha’s blueberry blatently & brutally batters and bruises oboerista

27 10 2006

blackberryIt was right out of a bad sitcom script. I sit down in my airline seat after a computer teaching gig in Houston. My seat is the center seat of 3. An elderly gentleman works his way down the aisle and takes his place next to me – in the window seat. A fewfat lady minutes later, the seat on my left is taken by an extremely heavy woman. It was simple physics – her body mass took up more space than her seat offered. While still-arriving passengers squeeze by her in the aisle, she leans more toward (or onto) me. Before the cabin door is closed and the announcement forbidding cellular phones is made, she plunges her hands into her purse and pulls out a blackberry. Her thumb is knocking the thumbwheel feversihly, and she is laughing out loud at her newly-read emails. She again plunges her hand into her bag and pulls out a cell phone. She blackberry-browses with her right hand and dials the cell phone with her left – and then she booms her private converation for the entire state of Texas to hear. Of course, all this activity is accompanied by exagerated hand and body gestures. Remember, I am next-to/under all of this! I am getting clobbered! She was traveling with another woman who was seated behind her, so she was constantly turning in her seat (actually, quite an impossible thing, really!) to loudly talk to her friend. Thank goodness she fell asleep before too long and stayed that way until we approached DC.

Hah! She missed the in-flight meal!

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One response

13 12 2011
Blue

That ishnigt’s just what I’ve been looking for. Thanks!

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